rate_review Reviews

Liked it! Please post another chap! I'd like to know what happens next!

Wonderfully describtive. Are you going to finish it?

Short, yes, but you have a good plot line going. I am however seeing a lot of gramatical and spelling errors. It's not bad, I do it myself, but a really good word processor will help you tremendously. I will admit that I am the world's worst speller and I Bow in awe of my spell checker. Also, and I don't mean to be critical, at this point your character seems a little flat - one dimentional. Flesh her out. Flesh out the surroundings. She is so focused on her thoughts that a lot is neglected. I am intrigued by herho iho is she? Where in ME is she from? You are doing great! I applaud you!

Also, I noticed thou uou used " 'tis" in a prose section as opposed to dialogue. Not good. When writing discriptive paragraphs try not te ode odd, archaic, contractions like that one. "Can't", "Won't" etc. are fine but " 'tis" is mainly used in dialogue alone. Same goes for " 'til". If it's unavoidable fine usu usually not good gramaticly.

If you are in need of a Beta, I would be happy to help. I love helping new writers almost as much as I love writing itself.

Oh, and thanks for the reviews. I will be updating "Anira" shortly along with its paralell "Whisper the Wind"
Hope to hear from you soon.

Ithilin